Misc. Ramblings

We are doomed to repeat our mistakes. Awhile back I talked about Our Governor proposing to increase taxes to fund her new mass (as in too poor to own a Mercedes SUV) transportation system even though she and her fellow Republicans campaigned on a no new taxes platform. I also stated Democrats would not oppose the increase because of the financial benefits that would also accrue to them from all the proposed construction projects.

What I did not expect was Democrats wanting to trump the Governor by increasing taxes even more than she wants so that pet projects critical public service programs can be funded in the home districts of said Democrats. I guess one should never under estimate the stupidity short-sightedness of some politicians. Even as these Democrats push for higher taxes the voters are taking names and will remember them on election day.

Interestingly enough, the only people, other than tax payers, that are protesting the proposed tax increases are her fellow Republicans. Most, if not all, of her fellow travelers (to coin a phrase) have disavowed ever knowing the Governor and are refusing to support the proposal.

Now, let me say that we haven't had an excise tax increase in decades, all the while costs have been going up. So, perhaps a case could be made that we should do so now. But that case has not yet been made and if it isn't, the only mass transit that will occur is the one that transports the loosing Democrats out of the Legislature.

Government can be a huge waste of resources. There, I've said it. One of the things I do not miss from my days as a Budget Analyst is doing what-if scenarios. That is, creating financial spreadsheets that forecast costs based on various factors. Don't get me wrong, being open to innovative solutions is a Good Thing. But randomly casting about, by creating multiple scenarios that will never happen, is a huge waste of time.

This waste of time eats up countless man-hours of work and serves no purpose. For example, when I was with the Hawai'i Senate Committee on Ways and Means, each scenario would consume several hundred pages of printouts. The preparation of said printouts would take days. Heck, just trying to be sure the numbers balanced took countless hours. We did this, even though we tried to get the Senators to read simple summary spreadsheets that would give them the same information, but in a much quicker and more understandable and flexible format. But nooooo. They refused to budge and wanted multiple scenarios, none of which would have any chance of passing, created using an old mainframe-based computer system.

While I genuinely like and respect my bosses, it is very difficult to work under these conditions. Now that I'm being dragged into doing scenarios again, I'm beginning to get some of the old feelings of frustration. It's one thing to be told to do these things. But it's another to be told, and in the same breath, be told that they will not be used. So why do it? I dunno know. I just work here.

A Story of Creation
In the beginning, God created heaven and earth.

Shortly thereafter God was in receipt of a notice to show cause why He shouldn't be cited for failure to file an environmental impact statement. He was granted a temporary planning permit for the project, but was stymied by a Cease and Desist Order for the earthly part.

At the hearing, God was asked why He began His earthly project in the first place. He replied that He just liked to be creative.

Then God said, "Let there be light."

Officials immediately demanded to know how the light would be made. Would it require strip mining? What about thermal pollution?

God explained that the light would come from a huge ball of fire, and provisional approval was granted with the proviso that no smoke would result.

The authorities demanded the issuance of a building permit, and (to conserve energy) required that the light be left off half the time. God agreed, saying He would call the light "Day" and the darkness "Night." Officials replied that they were only interested in protecting the environment, not in semantics.

God said, "Let the earth bring forth green herb and such as many seed."

The EPA agreed, so long as only native seed was used.

Then God said, "Let waters bring forth creeping creatures having life; and the fowl that may fly over the earth."

Officials pointed out this would require approval from the Department of Game coordinated with the Heavenly Wildlife Federation and the Audubongelic Society.

Everything went along smoothly until God declared that He intended to complete the project in six days.

Officials informed God it would take at least 200 days to review His many waiver applications and environmental impact statements. After that there would have to be a public hearing, and then there would be a 10-12 month probationary period before....

At this point, God created Hell. But as that name was already held by a private company incorporated in Aruba and had patented the name, He instead called it "Government".

How Government Works
Once upon a time the government had a vast scrap yard in the middle of a desert.

Congress said,"Someone may steal from it at night." So they created a night watchman position and hired a person for the job.

Then Congress said,"How does the watchman do his job without instruction?" So they created a planning department and hired two people, one person to write the instructions, and one person to do time studies.

Then Congress said,"How will we know the night watchman is doing the tasks correctly?" So they created a Quality Control department and hired two people. One to do the studies and one to write the reports.

Then Congress said,"How are these people going to get paid?" So they created the following positions, a time keeper, and a payroll officer, then hired two people.

Then Congress said,"Who will be accountable for all of these people?" So they created an administrative section and hired three people, an Administrative Officer, Assistant Administrative Officer, and a Legal Secretary.

Then Congress said,"We have had this command in operation for one year and we are $18,000 over budget, we must cutback overall cost." So they laid off the night watchman.

Three Boys
Three boys are in the schoolyard bragging of how great their fathers are.

The first one says:"Well, my father runs the fastest. He can fire an arrow, and start to run, I tell you, he gets there before the arrow".

The second one says:"Ha! You think that's fast! My father is a hunter. He can shoot his gun and be there before the bullet".

The third one listens to the other two and shakes his head. He then says:"You two know nothing about fast. My father is a civil servant. He stops working at 4:30 and he is home by 3:45"!!

Aloha!